Departure

At 3:15am I felt the Lizard King get out of bed. I knew this time was coming, but it didn't make it any easier. I couldn't fall back to sleep and I lay in bed waiting for him to come out of the bathroom so we could say our goodbyes. The night before, Princess had fallen asleep snuggling LK’s arm, crying off and on. They had already said their goodbyes then because we didn’t want to wake her.

LK left the bathroom, came over and hugged and kissed me, then went downstairs. I couldn't fall back to sleep. I climbed out of bed and went downstairs to hug and kiss him one more time. Back up in bed I lay there, listening for the sound of the shuttle service vehicle and the wheels of his suitcase rolling down the walkway and finally the sound of the vehicle pulling away.

At some point I drifted off to sleep and woke again around 7:30. Princess woke up about 15 minutes later. When we got downstairs we saw this.

After reading the note (herself) she opened the box and found this.

He really is the best dad and husband, isn't he?

This was harder than I thought it would be and I am feeling so very sad today. I'm sure it will pass.

Riding the Roller Coaster, Shady Style

Lizard King's sister and brother-in-law left today, after a fun-filled week. We went to Multnomah Falls, Beaverton Farmers Market, Saturday Market and Cannon Beach. I will post more about the visit and some pictures later. We had so much fun spending time with them. Princess really loved her time with them and was so sad when they left.

I thought you all might enjoy riding the roller coaster with us. That job that we were waiting on did not come through. However, LK got a call yesterday from the company that offered him the Afghanistan job. He had sent a very professional letter, informing them that he would not be going to Afghanistan. He also told them that if anything came up stateside, he would be very interested. We never expected to hear from them.

They must be extremely impressed with his resume, because it looks like they pulled some strings. LK will be working for the same company BUT in South Carolina, specifically Greenville. The money isn't quite as good, but it is still very good. He will come home once a month and Princess and I will also fly down to see him.

I always say that everything happens for a reason. I know that if Afghanistan had not happened, this would be so much harder for us. LK is leaving Sunday morning. We are trying to get as much time together as possible, so it will be a few more days before I'm back to the bloggy world on a regular basis. I hope you all understand. We also have some last minute shopping to do. He and I feel so much better about this job. I know it will still be hard, but nothing like it could have been.

I hope you have enjoyed today's ride.

The Eleventh Hour

I've been far away from the bloggy world for a long time. Things are about to change...big time.

On Monday, the Lizard King had an interview for a job...here. Wednesday, pulling into the parking garage at the airport to pick up his sister and brother-in-law, LK got the call. The job was a no. I looked at him and said the words that had been going through my mind for the last few days. "Please stay. We'll figure it out. We always do." He told me that he had been thinking the same thing. The possibility of this local job had both of us rethinking things.

Later that night LK and I talked. He then revealed to me the things he had learned when his airline details arrived. It included things like:

Back Pack to carry two days of clothes

Flashlight - Red, Green or Blue lens (Blackout camp rules)

Breakfast/power bars (possible travel delays with no foodavailability)

Pillow, Flat Sheet, Extra Blanket, Wash Clothes, Towels (2-3 Bath. 4-6 Hand)

and comments from the field:

Bedding for cot style sleeping. I have an air mattress from Amazon & use a twin fitted sheet.Put an air mattress on the cot -Tolerable comfort. Pillow really helps. Amazon does deliver to the FOBS 4-7 days for most items.

Be prepared to take pictures from the back of a Chinook between BAF & Shank - Rear door stays open. Ask for tail gunner Roberts - She is my favorite.

DO NOT bring conventional luggage. You will have to pull over rocks for long distances.Recommend Duffle bag style, great for mill air travel.

Headphones (Small portable) for watching movies on your computer. That's all the entertainment your allowed.

We made the decision for him to stay. I am so totally thrilled and relieved. The thought of him leaving was breaking my heart. I told him that the next year might suck, but we'll get through it. If he went to Afghanistan it would suck. If he stayed, financially it could suck. Either way it might suck, but I'd rather it suck with you than suck without you.

Then we got the call from the head hunter. They said that they are still in negotiations with the company he interviewed with, so that job may come through after all. Keep your fingers crossed!

Decisions

I have been a little out of touch lately. I haven’t been blogging and I haven’t been reading. We have had a huge decision to make and have spent the last week doing so. You all may remember the evil ex-wife. We have been looking forward to the time that the alimony ends. At this point we’ve still got another year. Once the alimony is paid, we still have to dig ourselves out of the hole the giant alimony payment has left us.

We also have a huge IRS payment to whittle down because, although we have to hold up our end of the divorce agreement, she did not hold up her end. She was to sign two tax returns so that they could be re-filed and save the Lizard King (LK) a butt-load of money in taxes. She agreed to it in the divorce, but then refused to follow through. Eventually, we cut of the alimony unless she signed the papers. She finally signed them. Unfortunately, we learned that there is a statute of limitations for refiling tax returns and we were beyond it. So yes, we have this giant payment as well.

You might also remember that LK got laid off at the end of May. With the economy being what it is, finding a job was not proving to be an easy task.

You may also remember the wishing tree. It seems that I should have been a lot more specific when sending my wishes out to the universe. I wished for a six figure job that LK would love. I asked for abundance. I asked for financial freedom.

LK texted me last week and asked if I wanted to go out to dinner that evening. I don’t know how, but I knew something was up. At dinner he asked me if I remembered the company who contacted him months ago. They had locations in Canada and Afghanistan. At the time I looked at him and told him that he would work in Afghanistan over my dead body. That was the end of that.

What he didn’t tell me (until last week) was that the company had offered him a job in Afghanistan making A LOT of money. It was in an unsafe zone. He turned it down. They told him that there would be other things coming up and that they would get back to him. He figured they were just blowing smoke and forgot about it.

They contacted him last week and offered him a supervisor position. And they doubled the salary. We were floored. It is a one year contract. Work three months, take 2 weeks off to come home.

I can’t even begin to tell you how difficult it was to make this decision. We went back and forth hundreds of times a day. Even after making the decision we want to change our minds, but we know that LK going to Afghanistan is the best decision for our family. The year will be difficult, but our lives will be changed. We can pay off the evil ex-wife, we can pay off the taxes, we can pay off the credit cards, we can buy a house, we can put money away for retirement, LK can stop working two jobs and breaking his back doing construction. We can breathe.

My heart aches when I think about him being gone so long. We haven’t told Princess yet and I am so dreading that conversation. She is so close with LK. This is going to break her heart.

My friends are rallying around me. They are here for me, supporting me, as is my sister. I am grateful to everyone who is here to support me and Princess. They are how we will get through the next year. LK leaves on July 11th. That is just too soon. And I am just so sad.

A Departure

In March of 2007 the Lizard King and I made the decision to homeschool Princess. Having always wanted to be a teacher, I was as excited for me as I was for her. I learned about unschooling and was fascinated by it. It sounded so beautiful and natural. I wasn't sure it would work, but we started on that path and found that it does work and it was wonderful. Princess learned to read and is figuring out math as we live our lives.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately and I've been feeling so very conflicted. I trust and love the unschooling life and it works well for us. Still, I felt like something was missing.

A few days ago I pulled out some old workbooks that I had purchased in the very beginning. We started with a Strawberry Shortcake telling time workbook. We worked on this until we were half way through the book. When I wanted to stop, I got the same disappointed response that I get at the end of a playdate. "Awwwwww! Can we do more? Pleeeaaaase?"

The next morning at breakfast Princess told me she wanted to work in that book again. I told her that when we got home from ballet in the afternoon we could do it then. Her response was a big whine. She was begging me to work in this book. We ended up being 30 minutes late for a playdate because she wanted to do school work!

How can I deny her this when she loves it so much, simply because I want to live this unschooled life? Isn't part of unschooling following your child's passions?

We have been working on some things over the last few days. For science we have done Sid the Science Kid, watching the shows and then doing the explorations ourselves. We bought a sketch book from the craft store and decorated it to use as a science journal.

I bought some writing paper and Princess started writing and illustrating a well know rhyme.


We read to each other every day. I've ordered a Montessori style math program. I purchased Story of the World Volume I where we can learn history in a story format and do activities related to what we learn. I found a geography book at The Learning Palace.

Princess is having the best time! She absolutely loves it! I'm pretty relaxed about how we do it and when we do it and even if we do it. So what are we now?

I've decided we are eclectic homeschoolers for a couple of reasons. What we're doing is pretty eclectic. We are doing school work with an unschooly attitude. Unschoolers would say that we aren't unschoolers and traditional homeschoolers would call us unschoolers so I think eclectic works well. The other reason? I like the sound of the word. *eclectic* Say it! It's fun!

Our Journey to Unschooling

There has been some interest in homschooling & unschooling. I thought I would share our journey with you.

When Princess was 3 we made the decision to put her in preschool so that I would be able to work more. I'm a self-employed massage therapist so I can set my own hours. She started with three mornings, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. This was hard for her, but she handled it pretty well. Since she seemed to be doing well I decided to extend my work day and her school day.

By the end of the first week I called my husband crying. I missed my Princess so much and I hated being away from her that long. My husband, being the supportive man he is, instantly suggested I cut back my hours. What a relief!

As time went by, my husband and I saw our daughter fading away. Our happy little girl who always had a smile on her face was becoming a very somber and reserved child. It was heartbreaking.

We were in bed one night discussing what to do because it was so painfully obvious that what we were doing was not working. We didn't want to put her in public school, and private school wasn't an option for many reasons. Besides, how would either of those options be any better?! I turned to my husband and said, "What about homeschooling?" His response? "That will work!"

After that it was a whirlwind of rearranging things. At last everything was settled and Princess and I were home together. I read a lot of books on homeschooling. I read books on unschooling. I found Yahoo groups, both local and nationwide. And I found Village Home, my community...our community.

Unschooling spoke to me, although I didn't really understand how it worked for young children. How can you unschool reading and basic math. Well, I needn't have worried. My daughter is showing me how.

Many people worry that they don't have the patience for this. My husband will tell you that I have no patience. It is something I am working on. This is so worth it. I love the time I have with my daughter and I wouldn't trade it for anything.